Fun Stuff...Off Topic(O/T)

[riverbabe]

November 11th, Remembrance Day
"In Flanders Fields" is a war poem in the form of a rondeau, written during the First World War by Canadian physician Lieutenant Colonel John McCrae.

In Flanders fields the poppies blow
Between the crosses, row on row,
That mark our place; and in the sky
The larks, still bravely singing, fly
Scarce heard amid the guns below.

We are the Dead. Short days ago
We lived, felt dawn, saw sunset glow,
Loved and were loved, and now we lie
In Flanders fields.

Take up our quarrel with the foe:
To you from failing hands we throw
The torch; be yours to hold it high.
If ye break faith with us who die
We shall not sleep, though poppies grow
In Flanders fields.

[Louetta]

Anyone else interested in the World Series of Poker? Final table broadcast is (or maybe starts) in my area tonight. Principal sponsor is Gentleman Jack's, which is booze, in case you're tired of people trying to play tricks on Sasquatch.

[jiesen]

I love poker! Been too distracted lately to pay much attention to it tho- but I want to get another game going with my friends, last time was lots of fun... with booze, even more so!

[Louetta]

Just found out today that rutabagas and turnips are the same thing, or just about. Was I the only one who didn't know that?

[riverbabe]

Just found out today that rutabagas and turnips are the same thing, or just about. Was I the only one who didn't know that?

Sorry, but yup!

[jiesen]

Just found out today that rutabagas and turnips are the same thing, or just about. Was I the only one who didn't know that?

I had no idea what a rutabaga was until just now. thanks!

[Louetta]

I had no idea what a rutabaga was until just now. thanks!

It's no wonder with all this crap about meats and cheeses that we'd lose track of our veggies.

[billyjoe]

Louetta, By coincidence I was discussing turnips with one of the old timers in the pool the very morning you posted. He said turnips were often plowed under as a means of improving farmland. This came after I mentioned a local farmer that plowed under a field of radishes for the same reason. They were large, white, and edible, but there just wasn't much demand for radishes and the cost of seed was less than that of traditional fertilizer.

--------------------billy

[Louetta]

Louetta, By coincidence I was discussing turnips with one of the old timers in the pool the very morning you posted. He said turnips were often plowed under as a means of improving farmland. This came after I mentioned a local farmer that plowed under a field of radishes for the same reason. They were large, white, and edible, but there just wasn't much demand for radishes and the cost of seed was less than that of traditional fertilizer.

--------------------billy

Interesting. Methinks turnips make a nice change from squash. I usually steam them with a little salt and black pepper.

Separately, we're supposed to get our first snow tonight. Gosh.

[Phoenix7]

One liners have always been my favorites. With turmoil going on all over the world , a good laugh is welcome in most quarters.

Took a girlfriend bungee jumping. As her body hit and spread out over the rocks below , I thought , "That'll teach you to lie about your weight."

The shortest joke , 2 women sitting quietly!

At what age is it appropriate to tell my dogs that they are adopted?

My heavy girlfriend started crying because an airline made her buy 2 seats. I said , "Yes but you get 2 meals" That cheered her right up!

Last night my wife called me a lazy bastard , Gezzz I almost fell off my stair lift!

The Biggest lie ever, "I have read and agreed to the terms of use.

Curry: the only food that comes out looking the same as it went in.

Women find me extremely attractive. The fatter I am , the better. They'll do anything for me and they love me more than they do you . What am I ? Answer your wallet!

My fear of insomnia keeps me awake at night.

Dear student loan. Thank you for saving my life. I can't think how I ever can repay you!

Advertisement for the Braille Superstore, "Thousands of Braille products , many of which you have never seen before!"

[Phoenix7]

Have you heard about the 2 Catholic Parrots?

No? well here you go!

A lady goes to her priest one day and tells him, 'Father, I have a problem.
I have two female parrots,
But they only know to say one thing.'
'What do they say?' the priest asked.
They say, 'Hi, we're hookers! Do you want to have some fun?'
'That's obscene!' the priest exclaimed,
Then he thought for a moment......
'You know,' he said, 'I may have a solution to your problem. I have two male talking parrots, which I have taught to pray and read the Bible...
Bring your two parrots over to my house, and we'll put them in the cage with Francis and Peter.
My parrots can teach your parrots to pray and worship,
And your parrots are sure to stop saying that phrase in no time.'
'Thank you,' the woman responded, 'this may very well be the solution.'
The next day,
She brought her female parrots to the priest's house....
As he ushered her in,
She saw that his two male parrots
Were inside their cage holding rosary beads and praying...
Impressed,
She walked over and placed her parrots in with them...
After a few minutes,
The female parrots cried out in unison:
Hi, we're hookers! Do you want to have some fun?'
There was stunned silence...
Shocked, one male parrot looked over at the other male parrot and says,

'Put the beads away, Francis
Our prayers have been answered"

[Phoenix7]

AS A WOMAN AGES BEAUTIFULLY DONE!

http://nethugs.com/interesting/aging-in-a-painting/

[Phoenix7]

"I WANT NATALIE!" Folks this one is SLICK!

The brothel’s madam opened the door to find a frail, elderly gentleman standing there. “May I help you?” asked the madam.
“I want Natalie,” replied the old man.
“Sir, Natalie is one of our most expensive ladies. Perhaps someone else?”
“No, I must see Natalie,” insisted the old man.
Just then, Natalie appeared and advised the old man that she charges $1000 a visit. Without blinking an eye, he reached in his pocket and handed her ten $100 bills. The two of them then went up to a room for an hour, after which the old man calmly left.
The next evening, he appeared at the brothel again, demanding to see Natalie. Natalie explained that no one had ever come back two nights in a row and that there were no discounts… the price was still $1000. Again, he took out the money and the two of them went up to a room. An hour later, he left.
No one could believe it when he showed up the third consecutive night. Again, he demanded to see Natalie, handed her the money and they went up to a room. After the hour had passed, Natalie questioned him. “No one has ever used my services three nights in a row. Where are you from?”
“I’m from Los Angeles,” he replied.
“Really?” Natalie said. “I have family living there.”
“Yes, I know,” the old man said. “Your father passed away and I’m your sister’s attorney. She asked me to give you $3000.”

[billyjoe]

Phoenix, No surprise. Most of us have been screwed by a lawyer at one time or another.

-------------------billy

[Phoenix7]

"LITTLE JOHNNY PRAYS!"

At dinner, little Johnny was asked to lead the prayer.

"But I don't know how to pray," he replied.

“Just pray for your family, friends and neighbors, the poor, etc.," said his father.

"Okay”, the boy said. "Dear Lord, thank you for our visitors and their children, who finished all my cookies and ice cream. Bless them so they won't come again.

Forgive our neighbor's son, who removed my sister's clothes and wrestled with her on her bed.

This coming Christmas, please send clothes to all those poor naked ladies on my Daddy's Blackberry.

And provide shelter for the homeless man who uses Mom's room when Daddy is at work. Amen"