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  • Peter Hansen
    Banned
    • Jul 2005
    • 3968

    Jokes

    One day a guy walks into a bank and robs it. He then turned around and asked the person "Did you see me rob this bank?", the person says "Yes". The robber shoots him. The robber then turns around to see a man and his wife, he then asks them "Did you see me rob this bank?". The man says "I didn't but my wife did!".

    A little boy is in school working on his arithmetic. The teacher says, "Imagine there are 5 black birds sitting on a fence. You pick up your BB gun and shoot one. How many blackbirds are left?"
    The little boy thinks for a moment and says, "NONE!"
    The teacher replies, "None, how do you figure that?"
    The little boy says, if I shoot one, all the other birds will fly away scared, leaving none on the fence."
    The teacher replies, "Hmm, not exactly, but I do like the way you think!"
    The little boy then says, "Teacher, let me ask you a question.
    There are 3 women sitting on a park bench eating ice cream cones. One is licking her cone, another is biting it and the third one is sucking it. How can you tell which one of the women is married?"
    The teacher ponders the question uncomfortably and then finally replies, "Well, I guess the one sucking her cone."
    To which the little boy replies, "Actually, its the one with the wedding ring, but I do like the way YOU think

    Comment

    • Peter Hansen
      Banned
      • Jul 2005
      • 3968

      Grandma smacks car!

      For God's sake ......don't blow your horn when Grandma is crossing!

      Comment

      • Peter Hansen
        Banned
        • Jul 2005
        • 3968

        Warning to all men!!

        Some ladies have been using a "Male Date Drug" to ensnare so many "trusting" males!

        Police are warning all men who frequent clubs, parties & local pubs to be alert and stay cautious when offered a drink by any woman.

        Many females use a date-drug on the market called 'Beer ' .

        The drug is found in liquid form and is available anywhere. It comes in bottles, cans, or from taps and in large kegs.

        Beer is used by female sexual predators at parties and bars to persuade their male victims to go home and sleep with them.

        A woman needs only to get a guy to consume a few units of Beer and then simply ask him home for no-strings-attached sex.

        Men are rendered helpless against this approach. After several Beers , men will often succumb to the desires to sleep with horrific looking women to whom they would never normally be attracted.

        After drinking Beer , men often awaken with only hazy memories of exactly what happened to them the night before, often with just a vague feeling that 'something bad' occurred.

        At other times these unfortunate men are swindled out of their life's savings, in a familiar scam known as 'a relationship' .. In extreme cases, the female may even be shrewd enough to entrap the unsuspecting male into a longer-term form of servitude and punishment referred to as 'marriage'.
        Men are much more susceptible to this scam after Beer is administered and sex is offered by the predatory females.

        Please forward this warning to every male you know.

        If you fall victim to this 'Beer ' scam and the women administering it, there are male support groups where you can discuss the details of your shocking encounter with similarly victimized men.

        For the support group nearest you, just look up 'Golf Courses' in the phone book.

        Comment

        • Peter Hansen
          Banned
          • Jul 2005
          • 3968

          What Is It All About?

          Earl Nightingale was a master motivator and thinker......the following 10 minute video clip will have a pronounced influence on your life. it is DEFINITELY worth your time it takes to listen!

          Comment

          • Peter Hansen
            Banned
            • Jul 2005
            • 3968

            A puzzle that reads your mind?

            Slick Puzzle .........TRY IT !

            Comment

            • billyjoe
              Senior Member
              • Nov 2003
              • 9014

              Eat your hearts out boys! Guess who I was out with tonight? You'll find out . Hint: Think of a beautiful woman associated with this site. Beauty and brains. Can't get any better than that.

              ------------billy

              Comment

              • Peter Hansen
                Banned
                • Jul 2005
                • 3968

                Gee I wonder ???

                We shall have to wait!
                Last edited by Peter Hansen; 08-08-2010, 10:42 AM.

                Comment

                • riverbabe
                  Senior Member
                  • May 2005
                  • 3373

                  Originally posted by billyjoe View Post
                  Eat your hearts out boys! Guess who I was out with tonight? You'll find out . Hint: Think of a beautiful woman associated with this site. Beauty and brains. Can't get any better than that.

                  ------------billy
                  heh heh hee. And how sweet it was! Sorry these aren't very clear billy (the camera person had shaky hands), but: "Scenes from an Art Gallery" starring billyjoe, mrs. billyjoe, riverbabe and the artist -- my son-in-law. Just look at how handsome billy is! Bet you'd never have guessed it! And mrs. billyjoe is gorgeous and a fantastic person to boot.

                  billyjoe, mrs. billyjoe, and the artist


                  riverbabe and the artist


                  mrs. billyjoe, billyjoe and riverbabe

                  Comment

                  • billyjoe
                    Senior Member
                    • Nov 2003
                    • 9014

                    Before I get a rolling pin upside the head ,I was actually with 2 beauties, my wife and Riverbabe, not to mention River's daughter (not shown), but then I'd not want to get into trouble with River's son-in-law, he knows some people back in Chicago that I'd rather not meet.

                    ------------billy

                    Comment

                    • riverbabe
                      Senior Member
                      • May 2005
                      • 3373

                      Originally posted by Peter Hansen View Post
                      We shall have to wait!
                      Heh. Didn't see that one coming Pete?

                      Comment

                      • Peter Hansen
                        Banned
                        • Jul 2005
                        • 3968

                        River we all luv ya

                        Originally posted by riverbabe View Post
                        Heh. Didn't see that one coming Pete?
                        River I had taken courses in BioChem and organic Chem in the past ...2 of the most difficult courses I have encountered in my career. Hats off to you for choosing a career related to those subjects. Your pharma analysis is always appreciated, and you do provide valuable advice in your column!

                        Comment

                        • Peter Hansen
                          Banned
                          • Jul 2005
                          • 3968

                          Is garlic Good For You?

                          Most Italian families love their pasta with sauces rich in olive oil and garlic..........BUT SOMETIMES you can get too much of a good thing LOL!

                          Check This Out!

                          Get set up with a new domain name right away. Affordable payment plans to fit any budget. Friendly customer support.

                          Comment

                          • billyjoe
                            Senior Member
                            • Nov 2003
                            • 9014

                            Be careful who your heros are. Pat Tillman is still a hero but the live one's often aren't.




                            -----------billy

                            Comment

                            • steelman
                              Senior Member
                              • Jun 2008
                              • 648

                              Originally posted by Peter Hansen View Post
                              Most Italian families love their pasta with sauces rich in olive oil and garlic..........BUT SOMETIMES you can get too much of a good thing LOL!

                              Check This Out!

                              http://www.webpickups.com/blog/tag/garlic-warning/
                              Ahhh Mannn.......Pete, I really don't feel very good right now. Thanks a lot for that one. I am sure I will have that pic in my head every time I make pasta sauce.
                              Best,
                              Steel
                              It's time to Grab the Bull by the Horns!

                              Comment

                              • Peter Hansen
                                Banned
                                • Jul 2005
                                • 3968

                                Steel

                                Originally posted by steelman View Post
                                Ahhh Mannn.......Pete, I really don't feel very good right now. Thanks a lot for that one. I am sure I will have that pic in my head every time I make pasta sauce.
                                Steel definitely not a sight for sore eyes.......sure does not look like the Brazilian and Russian girls at the ole Go Go Emporium LOL

                                Comment

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