Tweet
Originally posted by billyjoe
View Post
Regards,
Karel
-
Congratulations, Billyjoe! Snopes suggests that the original point of the article might have been that people just don't do the math and get lost in large number math altogether.
Regards,
KarelMy Investopedia portfolio
(You need to have a (free) Investopedia or Facebook login, sorry!) -
Here Here Now Some Jokes are in order!
Top 10 Party Games For Sr Citizens
10. Musical Recliners
9. Spin the Bottle of Mylanta
8. Hide and Go Pee
7. Simon Says Something Incoherent
6. Doc, Doc Goose
5. Red Rover, Red Rover, the Nurse Says Bend Over
4. Kick the Bucket
3. 20 Questions Shouted into your Good Ear
1. Scooter Chair demolition derby
An older gent had an appointment to see a urologist who shared an office with several other doctors. The waiting room was filled with patients. He approached the receptionist desk.
The receptionist was a large imposing woman who looked like a wrestler. He gave her his name. In a very loud voice the receptionist said, "Yes, I see your name here - You want to see the doctor about impotence, right?"
The heads of all the patients in the waiting room snapped around, to look at the very embarrassed man. He recovered quickly though, and in an equally loud voice replied, "No, I've come to inquire about a sex change operation ... And I'd like the same doctor that did yours!"
Guy says to his wife, “Alright you sexy thing, upstairs, now!”
The wife looks at him with a smile and says “Ohhhh, you horny bastard you!”
Guy reples “No seriously, hockey is starting… get the hell upstairs!
An old maid wanted to travel by bus to the pet cemetery with the remains of her cat. As she boarded the bus, she whispered to the driver, I have a dead pus**.
The driver pointed to the woman in the seat behind him and said, "Sit with my wife. You two have a lot in common.Comment
-
It Hit Me Like A Bolt Of lightening!
No Longer Confused
Confused
I became confused when I heard the word "Service" used with these agencies:
Internal Revenue 'Service'
U.S. Postal 'Service'
Telephone 'Service'
Cable TV 'Service'
Civil 'Service'
Customer 'Service'
This is not what I thought 'Service' meant.
But today, I overheard two farmers talking, and one of them said he had hired a bull to 'Service' a few cows.
BAM!!! It all came into focus. Now I understand what all those agencies are doing to us.
You are now as enlightened as I am. !!!!!!!Comment
-
The MAGIC GREEN HAT
My Magic Green Hat
The other day I needed to go to the emergency room. Not wanting to sit there for 4 hours, I put on my MAGIC GREEN HAT. When I went into the E.R., I noticed that 3/4 of the people got up and left.
I guess they decided that they weren't that sick after all. Cut at least 3 hours off my waiting time.
Here's the hat:
Emblazened On the HAT in HUGE BOLD LETTERS IS THE FOLLOWING:
" US BORDER PATROL "
It also works at DMV. It saved me 5 hours.
At the Laundromat, three minutes after entering, I had my choice of any machine, most still running.
If you live in Texas, it might cut your wait time at the grocery store.
But...don't try it at McDonald's. The whole crew took off and left out the back door and l never got my order!Comment
-
One HELLUVA Snowblower!
If you have a snowblower that has difficulty blowing dandruff off a mosquito......perhaps here is your next snowblower! WOW
This Snow Blower with a 454 cubic inch big block Chevrolet V8 produces 412 horsepower.
Just in case you're havin' any trouble removing snow from your driveway... This baby will blow snow back to where it came from... More story at the bottom...
And now for the rest of the story....
If you're tired of anemic, one-lung snow blowers with their slipping drive belts, you might consider Kai Grundt's V8 snow blower, which raises the bar on the traditional snow blower in every respect. With electric start, electric block heater, antifreeze heater and eight cylinders, it has no drive belts to freeze up and you'll never get bored with the job, as the 454 cubic inch big block Chevrolet V8 produces 412 horsepower, 430 foot pounds of torque and can throw snow 50 feet at just 3500 rpm.
Nor will you get cold, as the machine has been ingeniously
designed to route the engine coolant through the handle bars, with the rear mounted, enclosed radiator keeping the operator nice and cozy.
Maneuvering the massive beast (it has a total wet weight of 912 lbs) is a breeze thanks to the hydraulic-drive 4WD skid steer on independent walking beams, which offers a zero turning radius. It's also as fast as you like, with an infinitely adjustable speed range on the drive wheels via dash mounted flow control. At the opposite end of the scale, it has more than enough torque to pull your car out of the ditch before the hydraulic motors stall!
Adding to the well-balanced feel of the unit, just 15 pounds of down force on the handlebars will lift the auger blade off the ground in order to climb stairs/walkways for ease of snow removal. Safety has been, and continues to be, paramount, with spring return to center "fail safe" type
directional controls with emergency stop and tether cords.
Safety is one of the key themes, with a flashing blue light (as required by law in many areas) being the least of the safety features. None will fail to hear you with those twin throaty exhausts, which come standard with 92 decibels at the controls, though if the rumble of a V8 exhaust is music to your ears, you can obviously go much louder. Even at the standard baffling, hearing protection is strongly suggested.
The powerful yard machine lights and a dashboard with back lit gauges complete the package to ease the burden of this normally reviled task. The custom 42 inch, two-stage auger has a Chevrolet 10 bolt truck differential with spool and a centrifugal auger clutch with shear pin protection, further adding to the image of this "automotive theme blower." As each unit is custom-built, optional extras for
the snow blower are both diverse and outrageous as the base unit - there is unlimited auger choices from single to multi stage designs and various motor combinations to suit the religious preferences of the customer (Chevy, Dodge Hemi, Ford); and such exotica as a V-10 or a diesel engine or remote starting can be accommodated. And if, after a while, you feel you've outgrown the 400 horses, this particular engine is well catered for in the performance modification area, with Lunati camshaft, Milodon Gear drive, Holley and Edelbrock components to name a few; and there's always the fuel injection option too, if you feel you need to throw the snow out of the county or ensure your seat in the "neighborhood blower blingster hall of
fame."Comment
-
These eagles are nesting all around us. They seem to have quite a range of travel looking for food. Once I was walking my small dog and one started circling around us about 150 feet up. We headed for home.
---------------billyComment
-
We're totally emptying the computer room, stripping off the old wallpaper, and painting. With nearly 29 years of accumulated important papers and obsolete computer manuals and programs I hope to throw out at least 50% of the former contents of the room. It will take until I'm 89 years old to refill it to its former magnifisense. That spelling isn't right but my Funk and Wagnalls is nowhere to be found.
------------billyComment
-
-
I bid $129,900
I bid $129,900 for the sub home LOL.Comment
-
Pete,
Good one : 1957 Ants Die. Yes they did. But not before a war was instigated between the Black and Red Ant colonies.
---------------billyComment
-
Uncle Jack grammar lesson
Today's grammar lesson:
In this world of hi-tech, I have noticed that many, who text message and email, have forgotten the "art" of capitalization. Those of you who fall into this world, please take note of the following statement. I cannot stress enough that grammar is important:
Capitalization is the difference between helping your Uncle Jack off a horse and helping your uncle jack off a horse.
This lesson is finished.Best,
Steel
It's time to Grab the Bull by the Horns!Comment
-
Can you pass this test?
Can you pass this test?
You are driving down the road in your car on a wild, stormy night, when you pass by a bus stop and you see three people waiting for the bus:
1. An old lady who looks as if she is about to die
2. A very old friend who once saved your life.
3. The perfect partner you have been dreaming about.
Which one would you choose to offer a ride to, knowing that there could only be one passenger in your car?
Think before you continue reading.
This is a moral/ethical dilemma that was once actually used as part of a job application.
You could pick up the old lady, because she is going to die, and thus you should save her first. Or you could take
the old friend because he once saved your life, and this would be the perfect chance to pay him back. However, you may never be able to find your perfect mate again.
YOU WON'T BELIEVE THIS....................
The candidate who was hired (out of 200 applicants) had no trouble coming up with his answer. He simply answered: 'I would give the car keys to my old friend and let him take the lady to the hospital. I would stay behind and wait for the bus with the partner of my dreams.'
Sometimes, we gain more if we are able to give up our stubborn thought limitations.
Never forget to 'Think Outside of the Box.'
HOWEVER....., The correct answer is to run the old lady over and put her out of her misery, have sex with the perfect partner on the bonnet of the car, then drive off with the old friend for a few beers.
God, I just love happy endings!
=Comment
-
One Helluva LADY!
Look at this lady - Let us never forget!
The prize doesn't always go to the most deserving.
Irena Sendler
There recently was a death of a 98 year-old lady named Irena.
During WWII, Irena got permission to work in the Warsaw ghetto, as a Plumbing/Sewer specialist.
She had an 'ulterior motive'.
She KNEW what the Nazi's plans were for the Jews (being German).
Irena smuggled infants out in the bottom of the tool box she carried, and in the back of her truck she carried a burlap sack (for larger kids).
She also had a dog in the back, that she trained to bark when the Nazi soldiers let her in and out of the ghetto.
The soldiers, of course, wanted nothing to do with the dog, and the barking covered the kids/infants noises.
During her time of doing this, she managed to smuggle out and save 2500 kids/infants.
She was caught, and the Nazi's broke both her legs, arms and beat her severely.
Irena kept a record of the names of all the kids she smuggled out, and kept those names in a glass jar, buried under a tree in her back yard.
After the war, she tried to locate any parents that may have survived it and reunited the family.
Most had been gassed. Those kids that she helped, got placed into foster family homes, or were adopted.
Last year Irena was up for the Nobel Peace Prize.
She was not selected. Al Gore won --- for a slide show on Global Warming.Comment
-
Pete,
I think it is all true. Here's more info. Poor Al Gore. He can't catch a break. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Irena_Sendler
Too bad the commies also treated her like crap. Probably a true saint.
-------------billyComment
-
Billie
Billie my dad grew up in the Ukraine under a repressive Soviet regime. I still remember when he visited back in the seventies how he had to talk to his brother out in the fields to avoid anyone monitoring their conversations. Letters sent to us from relatives had lines that were totally ink eradicated , although the material in question was just general family stuff.Originally posted by billyjoe View Post
This is what I fear is coming here under the current "REGIME" ....Shifty Joe Liberman has introduced a bill to give the ......ahem president the ability to swtich off the internet if he deems a security emergency exists.....emergency is not defined.
Liberman is retiring ,and not running for reelection. Why did the sneaky bastard wait to the last minute to propose such a bill?.......BOTTOM LINE ....censorship in any form restricts freedom.Comment
Comment